You’re reading this and maybe you’ve started university for the first time. Maybe it’s your second. Or fourth. You might be resitting a year and dreading it, or sitting your final year and panicking about The End.

Well I’m here to tell you – even if you think you know what’s going to happen, you don’t. Not even a smidgen . And that is going to be the best part of your year.

Welcome to the column that doesn’t really know shame, because it’s the place we discuss everything. This little corner of Strath Telegraph, is going to be your Sunday pep talk and your Monday motivation. The place for the gritty, messy, totally unbelievably human moments that are broken down Roland Barthes style. Don’t know him? He’s a French philosopher and also the best. Get on it.

The stuff we don’t really talk about, because we don’t think other people will quite get it. You know what I’m talking about; the panic, the stress, the love life, the ‘attempting to be Adult’ and the cooking failures. As well as the body image and the mental health and the ability to be confident and courageous, but still accept the scared moments and the boss moments.

I’m going to talk you up to feel like a proper boss, because #GIRLBOSS might be a dying term but it doesn’t need to be a dying mentality. So sit down, grab a cuppa. Get ready to get ~deep~ because, well. You’re at university now. All you should do now is think – think everything through and dismantle things you thought you knew, because we’re going to be talking about all manners of things. If you think you know, you don’t.

Sure you might have a mountain of deadlines this semester, but you’re also going to have drinks with friends. New friends, old friends, people-on-your-course-you-finally-got-the-courage-to-speak-to friends. No? Just me? (hint: speak to anyone and everyone. Don’t get shy. Friends can be found in the most unconventional places). No matter what year we’re in, you’re going to find out about how high the library fines are (hint: really fucking high). And how we might attempt not be a stereotypical white girl, but everyone gets Starbucks in the library during deadline/exam season. Your best find? How almost all of the buildings on campus are connected, so some exploring means the in-between-lecture times shorten. Because really, does anyone like being out of breath and sweating the first five minutes of class?

Here’s a few things you’re going to do this year, regardless of what year you’re in; you’re going to gain a ridiculous caffeine tolerance, find a drink that works for you more than a vodka coke because that gets boring, buy too many things with the first loan payment (I want to say you don’t need those jeans, but if your butt looks great then buy those jeans girls and guys), watch a lot of Netflix and possibly do one of two things; become a bit Instagram obsessed with multiple uncandid candids or completely fall of the social media stratosphere. There is no middle ground, unless you count Facebook Messenger. You may slag off avocado on toast, unless you’re already eating it, in which case well done. You might pick up a sport, because we all get restless sometimes and honestly, we all feel better after we sweat out some stuff. My pick? Running, outdoors and in the evenings. There’s something about running that focuses my mind.

But most of all, this year in front of you will both be long and short, completely mind-blowing and utterly challenging. Charming but also rude. Glasgow as your playground offers up a whole manner of things. Surprising, invigorating, terrifying and sometimes, you’ll feel like some weeks take the world apart and then stitch them back together again.

Good thing you found this column then, right?

I write exclusively to pull the world back together, and untangle the bits I don’t think we get. Welcome To Strathclyde Telegraph, I’m Lou. I hope you have a good time and as one of my friends would say:

Enjoy the ride.

By Lou Ramsay